Vicki and Staff of Generations on Alzheimers Walk
You’ve had a basic kind of day, come home from work, cooked dinner for the family, and sat down to the meal. And, then you get a call. Your father has had a stroke. He’s going to be okay, but his speech and cognition are slightly impaired, and he can’t move his left arm or leg. You, one of two siblings in your family and the one who lives the closest to Dad, are now officially in charge of ensuring he gets the best of care. You have a whole mix of complex emotions from sadness to fear to overwhelm and beyond. You’ve already got a full-time job, a house, a spouse, two teenagers of your own and a dog. How in the world are you going to manage all this?
Well, what if you didn’t have to manage all this, and Dad would get as good as or better care than you could arrange yourself? While it’s important to be involved and keep a handle on the decision making, maybe you don’t have to deal with absolutely everything including:
- rehabilitation or assisted living centers
- vetting in-home healthcare services and therapies
- dealing with all the legal and financial issues or
- navigating our complicated healthcare system.
Perhaps delegating at least some of the above items to elder care management professionals could bring much needed relief so that you can focus solely on connecting with your father and dealing with the complex emotions of all your family members as they react to the sudden changes in Dad. Not to mention you still need to tend to your own needs and those of your spouse, children and dog.
Aging life care management companies do for senior care coordination what a wedding planner/coordinator does for weddings. Aging life care management companies will coordinate with all “vendors” including but not limited to:
| families insurance companies Medicare financial planners lawyers | accountants rehabilitation and assisted living facilitieshospitals doctors, nurses and other specialists |
Are you already feeling less overwhelmed?
Vicki Sherman Doueck, MSW, LCSW, ASWCM, 32-year President and CEO of Generations Counseling and Care Management, LLC in Bergen County, NJ has one such organization. Vicki is a licensed clinical social worker who has loved making senior citizens happy ever since she was a teenager visiting in Miami Beach and frequently took time to listen to elderly men and women talk and tell their stories. Vicki’s company employs a team of social workers, nurses and psychologists to help the aging seniors, their family members and caregivers get accurate assessments and information for getting the right care.
What’s the most challenging part of navigating senior care successfully? Vicki notes that there are three things that are particularly troublesome:
- Having the initial conversation with your loved one who needs care. This is often uncomfortable and people, understandably, are often resistant to accepting the help they require, especially if it will involve moving out of their home or other major lifestyle changes.
- People with Dementia present complicated cases in many ways including decision making processes.
- Financial issues. People are living longer and need to know how to stretch out their funds accordingly.
| Vicki and her Mom (age 90) | Vicki (child on the right) with her Mom, Grandmother, and Great-grandmother |
Vicki offers the following tips for families:
- Start the conversation with your parents, grandparents or other aging loved ones before they need care. Defining their wishes early should the time come that they can’t care for themselves will be invaluable.
- In the conversation, drop your own agenda. Really listen to their fears. If there’s no real emergency, the older adult may come up with an idea for themselves that no one thought of.
- As for financials, it involves a complex set of systems. You need to go to the appropriate professionals on how to maximize your money, find out what’s out there, protect some money, and maybe qualify for state or federal benefits. Speak with elder law people, benefits people and others about what the realities of the costs are.
As a further note on finances, Certified Financial Planner® Theresa Yarosh (AKA “The Retirement Sherpa”) adds that the three most important things to have in old age to ease the burden on families are:
- proper long-term care insurance in place
- updated wills
- current powers of attorney documents that banks will accept.
At Generations, Vicki’s team of social workers, nurses and psychologists are adept at speaking with seniors on the complex subject of getting proper care. In fact, seniors will often discuss things with Generations’ staff members that they might not talk about with their own family members. This is a major part of the service at Generations, easing stress on the families and helping the patient feel more comfortable with the transition process into care and/or into rehabilitation services.
“I grew up around my grandparents and great grandmother, so being around older adults literally feels like home to me. I’ve been working with seniors, lifting their spirits, all my life in a way,” says Vicki.
She also says that since her firm doesn’t affiliate or accept commissions from any elder care facility or service provider, Generations Counseling and Care Management is positioned to give the most objective advice to families whose loved one needs care.
For more information on Generations Counseling and Care Management, go to www.generations-llc.com.
